Monday, December 28, 2009

A rose by any other name... still stinks?

Shakespeare said something to the effect of "a rose by any other name would smell as sweet". Someone else said, "What's in a name?". My question is, "What's in a title?".

I've never really been that hung up on titles, though I've been quick to point out that I was an administrative assistant not a secretary, or that I am my son's 'real mom' although not his birth mom. I've had lots of titles, assistant director, light operator, stage manager, receptionist, clerical assistant, wife, mother, daughter, sister, aunt, artist, etc. I always felt that they're just titles, they don't define who I am, the simply describe some of my roles in life.

So it is with surprise that I now find myself concerned with my job title. Does it reflect what I do for a living? Does is establish my place in the hierarchy? Is it taken seriously or dismissed out of hand as being too low on the totem pole to be of concern? Does it come with any perks? Should it be changed to better describe my position? What would changing it accomplish? The biggest question of all is - Would anyone even care what my title was or becomes?

I do see in myself the need to have a clearly defined title, along with an even greater need to have a clearly defined position established within the company hierarchy. That's just a fancy way of saying, "Who am I and where do I fit in?", questions we all ask at different times of our lives.

Sure wish I had an answer!

Recent events within my "circle" have made me feel demoted, devalued, and dismissed. Not a feeling that sits well with me, not anymore. At one time I would have accepted it and eaten my way through my depression. I can't eat my way through these situations any more, so I find myself getting angrier than in the past. I will not be dismissed, nor will I tolerate what I do being dismissed as unimportant.

Please understand one thing, though, which is that I do appreciate the opportunities I've been given to take on new projects and expand my duties. If I hadn't been given these opportunities I would have left long ago, bored out of my mind. I like where I work, I adore my bosses, and I have no desire to work anywhere else. But, it's hard having the tasks that I was hired to handle being dismissed as low on the priority list, which makes me feel that I'm personally low on the same list.

Ok. Time to end the pity party. No more whimpering, whining, or pouting (I couldn't think of another word that started with "wh"). Time to get over it. Yeah, right, sure... LOL